Religion and Spirituality

Something that has been tugging at me, ever since I started JVC, is this whole idea of "religion and spirituality." It is something I have always avoided. I don't mean I've avoided them altogether, I just avoided putting them together. It's funny though, how God usually corners me when I try to avoid things.
Since I've joined JVC, I've been asked countless times if I'm catholic. My responses: "Er, well, kind of." "I was, but not really anymore." "Well I'm a christian." "Well I have a relationship with Jesus." For those of you who don't know all about my "spiritual journey" (and I promise this will be short and vague) I grew up in the catholic church until about 6th grade. Up to that point, I understood God as a distant ruler that I had to listen to if I wanted to go to heaven. I had to pray the rosary this many times, I had to memorize the Our Father, I had to go to church on Sundays, I had to make my First Holy Communion, and I had to be Catholic, because that was how I was going to get to heaven. Needless to say, starting high school, I had a sour taste in my mouth about the whole idea of "religion."  I then started going to more of a "protestant" type church (mind you, I hate labels, but for the sake of explanation, I'm using them). I made some really great friends my freshman year who were part of a really great youth group, and throughout the rest of my time in high school, I grew closer to God, and learned that this whole thing is about knowing and following Jesus Christ. I realized I wanted God to be part of my every day and everything. I wanted Him in my music, in my running, in my school work, family, etc. I got baptized again as an act of obedience and of my commitment to God and following him with my life, and it's been an amazing journey since then.
In the meantime, I'd been able to avoid the religion question, and I still had this sour taste in my mouth about Catholicism. When I joined JVC, I had no idea how catholic it really was; I just knew that I identified with the four values (spirituality, community, simple living, and social justice) and I figured most people would identify with me in those important ways. In the couple months I've been in JVC, I'm learning that my idea of Catholicism was very skewed. I thought it was too religous, too routine, too traditional, too conservative, and I thought that it didn't focus on knowing God and following Jesus with our lives. Boy was I wrong. Most of the Catholics I've met in JVC are very intimate with God, and have a very intimate understanding of the bible. The Jesuits and nuns are very progressive (and awesome) and they are out loving people and doing the work of Jesus and spreading his word. They have played a huge part in my new understanding of the Catholic faith, and I'm so thankful for their involvement in my life and my Kansas City community. Father Jim Collins, a senior Jesuit who spoke at our JVC orientation, told us that it is good to be able to take spirituality and religion apart, but we should also be able to put it back together. I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the second part, but for now, I'm learning that the Catholic Church is a place where I can meet with God. It is a place where I can sing to Him, pray, hear His word, grow closer to Him, and be in community. It is a place filled with amazing people, broken people, confused people, weak, strong, and all of the above ragamuffin people who are just like me, working for God's kingdom. There are still things I don't understand about the Catholic Church, questions I still have to ask, and things I disagree with until I get more answers. For now, my response to the religion question will still probably be "I just follow Jesus." Or somewhere along the lines of that- but that's only because life, (at least mine anyway) doesn't have simple yes or no answers. It doesn't come in a pretty square box neatly wrapped with a bow. It looks more like if I were to try to wrap a fishing pole with a blindfold on.
"It is not good to have zeal without knowledge; nor be hasty and miss the way." Proverbs 19:2